Wednesday, February 6, 2013

The Less Than Sensational Truth Behind Those That Oppose Gay Marriage

I write this knowing I may lose friends, and I’m ok with that, because I have the right in this country, and the obligation to my conscience, to speak my mind and heart.  I read recently about a cake shop that is undergoing investigation and is being persecuted for turning down a homosexual couple, they stated that they would not make a same-sex wedding cake.  I personally voted against gay marriage in the elections, I am 100% opposed to it.  I’m not afraid or ashamed of this fact, but I’m not hateful in any way.  A celebrity chimed in on the situation and said of the shop owner “this man has wrapped up his hatred in the cloak of religion”.  Is everyone that is opposed to gay marriage hateful?  I dare you to think otherwise, just take a step out of the box that society has labeled. 

Why are people opposed to homosexual relations and marriage?  Sometimes people are grossed out.  Celebrities and left wingers will tell you to suck it up and put on your big girl panties and be more tolerant.  I think it’s gross when grown adults pick their noses in public.  I think it’s nasty if you don’t shower more than once a week (in a country and culture when bathing is easily accessible).  I think it’s disgusting when a large woman wears a shirt 3 sizes too small and bulges out of it (I’m a large woman, I can find clothing to fit my body).  I also, call me crazy, think it’s not quite right when people kiss their animals straight on the mouth.  Am I a horrible person for having these opinions of things that I find “gross”?  Knowing human anatomy and what happens during homosexual relations, isn’t it comprehensible that it is disturbing to some?  And that can’t be ok?

There are many other reasons that people oppose homosexual relations (including marriage).  There is always research and of course polls and statistics, which can arguably be subjective, but there is much truth on how children grow up differently with homosexual parents and how diseases are spread, more especially due to the cultural promiscuity among those labeling themselves homosexual.  But I’m not going to try to convince you that people are, for the most part, opposed to homosexuality because of a gross factor or any of these reasons listed above.  Why are most people opposed to homosexuality than?  Because they believe in something greater than themselves. 

Most people that are opposed to homosexuality have formed their opinion due to a religious belief.  There are many people, not unlike myself, that believe there is a God, a supreme deity that knows us, loves us, has a plan for us, and gives us rules and direction as he knows is best for us.  I believe in the Holy Bible.  I myself read the King James Version.  For those that have read the scriptures and know of Sodom and Gomorrah, or believe that Adam and Eve were given a command to multiply (and knowing no 2 men nor 2 women can multiply), there are no questions.  I think one of the most straightforward scriptures is found in Leviticus 18:22Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it [is] abomination.”  It can’t be more clear.  For those of you rolling your eyes at me, I am not in any way going to attempt to convert you to a belief of God as I see him.  I’ll always invite a study of Him, but ultimately that is between you and your conscience and God, and comes by searching and prayer, not by persuasion.  But the short and simple of it is that we believe God, the one who created this planet, our bodies, and everything for us, and knows best for us, that supreme being, has told us to not participate in homosexuality.  Period.  End of story. 

I challenge the most liberal, pro-homosexual individual to consider that.  Some of us still believe that there is a God, who has promised us consequences-positive or negative- according to his laws, and has decreed homosexuality should not be.  Is God hateful then, because he doesn’t like homosexuality?  Christ on the cross asked forgiveness for robbers that hung beside him, he saved a woman from being stoned that was breaking the law with adultery.  It is of my belief that God would have us love the sinners and hate the sins.  We are all his creations, his children, no matter what we do or become.  A mother will always love her child no matter how many times they are disobedient.  I say always, but I know that’s not always true, but we’re talking about God now, with the belief in a perfect love and mercy.  So should we not also love all of his children as we have seen his example?  The answer is a resounding yes!  I would love my children even if they picked up smoking (which is also against my beliefs) but that doesn’t mean I will celebrate their wrong choice or buy them cigarettes.  Can a cake shop owner still love one of God’s children without making her wedding cake because he does not support her choices?  Again, yes! 

Now I don’t want to be misunderstood or my message tossed from viability by sounding ignorant or all-knowing.  I was not in the cake shop that triggered this post.  My eyes are not blind to the fact that, despite our beliefs and efforts, we are not all as benevolent and kind as we should be, and none are perfect.  Do I always think, say, or do as I should?  Absolutely not.  Are you ready to cast the first stone?  I have reacted less lovingly than I should have in my own cake shops of life.  And of course there are those out there that are very open, and abrasive about the topic.  Beating a homosexual man for what you believe are his sins or hate mail with inappropriate slurs are a far cry however from the person holding a “Vote no on gay marriage” sign during voting season.  Just as some homosexual readers will peacefully allow me my beliefs and opinions while others think I don’t understand toleration and would call me names, some Christian readers will peacefully pray for those that don’t believe the same as they do and others would be throwing out slurs about God’s children that are not following his laws.

So a re-cap perhaps.  Do most anti-homosexuality individuals hate homosexuals?  No.  Do they believe that God loves his children?  Yes.  Do they believe that homosexuality is a sin that should not be practiced?  Yes.  For those of you that feel you have wasted your time on this old fashioned long-winded post, let me please explain one more point.  Truth is a universal constant, not relative.  A red traffic light will always mean that you need to stop, it is a law.  You cannot change that fact, no matter how much you’d like.  God is the same yesterday, today, and forever, and we are arrogant to think we can change his rules. 

As my thoughts streamed into writing this, the word “bigot” came to my mind.  Bigot means “a person who is intolerant of any ideas other than his or her own, especially on religion, politics, or race” (  I’ve heard this noun being thrown out all willy-nilly to those who oppose homosexual relations because of their “closed mindedness”.  I’ve heard people compare opposition of homosexuality to racism, which is far from the truth.  Might I say, understanding that this is more of a religious conviction than anything, that those unwilling to understand and be open minded to the fact that a God continues to disapprove of the act, are themselves taking on the name of bigot?  I think one of the highest insults that these bigots shout is that Christians (or any other God-fearing, God-respecting people) are hateful because of their opposition.  It seems to me that this is in fact, the “hatred in the cloak”.  A homosexual individual goes into a cake shop and wants a wedding cake made.  A religious individual cites their beliefs and declines.  The homosexual individual is upset by the assertion that they’re doing something wrong (no one likes to be told they’re wrong), their conscience might even be pricking them (read Bonds That Make Us Free-a great read!), they’ve been fed by the popular media that any opposition to their views is hatred… I’m sorry to have to be the bearer of bad news but you don’t have your scapegoat, we aren’t your big bad villain that you want to lash out at, the issue is far too complicated for that. 

So what’s to be done?  Despite my puny vote, my state approved homosexual marriage recently by a small margin.  In the voting pamphlet, it was clearly stated that religious groups cannot be punished for not taking part in homosexual marriage.  Must we all be legally affiliated with a religious group to exercise moral conscience?  I have a culinary degree and have made wedding cakes myself before.  If you’re looking for any cakes that have to do with homosexuality, fornication, adultery, pornography, cigarettes, coffee, tea, wine, beer, alcohol, swearing, marijuana or other drugs, I’m just not the cake decorator for you.  I will have lost out on your money, you will have lost out on a few minutes by asking.  You are not a victim.  I don’t hate you.  If you continue to feel like a victim, I won’t even ask you to “suck it up and put on your big girl panties and be more tolerant”, I will kindly invite you to re-read this post, to read the scriptures and attempt a conversation with God to know for yourself if what I believe is true (prayer), and even that “Bonds That Make Us Free” is a great read for those plagued by victim-itis. 

In the end, I ask myself, why am I writing this?  What’s my goal?  At first, I will be completely honest, this stemmed from a lot of frustration.  I believe most people (whether homosexual or heterosexual) are good people at heart.  I think it’s the loud one-off sensationalists and media that blow things out of proportion.  I have friends and co-workers that don’t agree with me on the topic of homosexual relations, and I don’t want them to ever picture me as a close-minded bigot, but rather as the loyal believer in someone and something larger than ourselves, who has set laws for our good.  I want to appeal to those that, like me, do not support homosexual relations-please remember that all of God’s children deserve kindness; his hand is always stretched out to us.  And as for the mentality that “if it’s not your life, it’s not your business-it’s not like you have to be gay” I humbly submit to you that it just doesn’t work that way for me.  Christ has said “when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren.” (Luke 22:32)  I know I am happiest when I follow the principles the Lord has given, I’m converted.  And as cheesy as “world peace” is (thinking Miss Congeniality), that’s what I would love.  I want what’s right, I want us to be good and right to each other, and I want us to be good and right in the sight of God.

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